there's a sequel to the things I've done
It's 4:10... am.. and I can't sleep.. the sun is just starting to rise.. and I find myself so restless that I can barely think.. I have started at least a million drawings.. but I end up erasing them all.. I've rendered countless pictures.. I've started about ten different blogs.. just trying to get a glimmer of this frustration out.. cutting has even crossed my mind.. but nothing seems to satisfy... nothing brings release... but I know somethings up.. God has something in store.. and I just can't seem to tap into it.. it's driving me insane. I can't sleep.. I can't eat.. all I can do is sit here and think and think and think and each and every thought is leading me nowhere, only adding to the frustration I'm feeling.. I just want to scream.. and just run.. and run and run and run until I can barely move.. until I can barely breathe.. barely talk... It almost feels like there is a fire inside and I'm slowly coming undone..
posted by ninja_e at 7/04/2006 04:08:00 AM
1 Comments:
wow eliza... i pray that god will reveal himself to you, in his time. that he will show you his deep and passionate love for you. that he will sift through the confusion and all that is inside you. he is refining you, eliza. that can be the hardest thing in the world, but can also be the most important and the most fulfilling. keep running after him. towards him. into his arms and onto his lap.
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